Friday, February 12, 2010

Yoga Cults

It is very easy for people to take their spiritual path and get a bit carried away with it. By that I mean preaching to others how they should live, eat, sleep, worship, etc. As Ashtangis, we are reminded that ours is an individual journey. We can learn from yoga teachers and gurus, but ultimately we must decide what is right for us as individuals according to our means and to our discoveries through the work of Yama and Niyama.
I came across a truly appalling story written by Sabrina Rubin Erdely in the February 18 issue of Rolling Stone magazine about a yoga cult called Dahn Yoga. If you are a Dahn practitioner, be warned that what you are practicing is not yoga and doesn't even vaguely resemble yoga. What Dahn Yoga is, in fact, is a scam run by a middle-aged Korean man named Seung Heun Lee who has managed to con a great many college students into thinking they can buy their way to enlightenment by giving all their money to his organization (Dahn Yoga) and relentless fund-raising. These students are drawn in gently by tai-chi and yoga-like exercises and are gradually driven to maxing out their credit cards in trying to make their weekly fund-raising quotas. They are then chided and driven toward damaging and humiliating acts such as: excessive exercise; holding their breath under water until their lungs strain and then jumping out to sing songs of praise to their Korean Master; drinking toilet-water; rubbing their faces in dirt; and even being sexually molested by the Master himself. In the end, those who make it that far are coerced into giving up all contact with family and friends and dedicating their lives exclusively to Dahn Yoga. Meanwhile, the Master himself is basking in his glory, jet-setting around the world, owning multi-million-dollar properties and canoodling with lovely young ladies. All, of course, paid for by the money he has stolen from these naive young people and their relentless fund-raising activities.
The former Dahn members that Ms. Erdely interviewed for her article all had plenty of moments where they felt ridiculous and seriously questioned what they were doing. Yet they were somehow always convinced that their doubts were a sign of weakness and that they just had to try harder. These doubts were a very disturbing aspect of this article; everyone seemed to have them and yet no one ever heeded them. Doubts are never a sign of weakness; they are your inner voice warning you that something is not right and should always be heeded. Yoga is not boot camp - you do not need to "try harder". Yoga does not entail acts of self-humiliation. Yoga does not require payments of money if no service is being rendered. And yoga does not involve worshiping any individual.
More disturbing still was the fact that even two years after getting out of this cult, the former members were still psychologically disturbed and confused about how to get on with their lives. The only enlightenment any of these former members seemed to receive from this experience was that they had been scammed and had wasted a few precious years of their lives. That is not the kind of yoga we want to be practicing.
Living a yogic life means checking in daily with those doubts and your values. Please do not let anyone, under any guise of yoga, tell you what you need to do to be enlightened.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Pratyahara - sense withdrawal

Sense-withdrawal. Why would we want to withdraw our senses and what exactly does that mean. Pratyahara is the fifth limb and it acts as a sort of bridge between the first four limbs and the last three. We are observing and enhancing our awareness of our behavior, our habits, our physical condition and our breath in the first four limbs and now we need away to turn inward to examine the functioning of our mind, and to surpass the mind and its ego to reach God Consciousness. It is not as simple as just sitting down and counting your breath. If it were that simple, we would all be enlightened by now and could probably get rid of those little purple mats. When we do sit down to observe our breath we are distracted, over and over again. What distracts us? The sounds from outside, the sounds or smell of the person next to us, our grumbling tummy or our sore bottom. Then what? Our mind travels to our thoughts about the person next to us, or to what we may want to eat for lunch after this god-forsaken session is over. Or to whether or not we ought to adjust our sitting position. This is a chain reaction that could go on and on until we catch ourselves so far removed from what we were initially trying to do that we don't even know how we got there! Sense withdrawal begins when we finally become aware of our distractedness. When we are able to catch ourselves moving "outward" with our thoughts and re-direct them back "inward", we are beginning to actually practice sense withdrawal. My teacher likes to make the distinction between the first four limbs and the last four limbs this way: the first four are things we do, or practice; the second four are things that will happen spontaneously after much practice. Pratyahara is that bridge where we can try to practice withdrawing our senses from outside stimuli but which will only truly be mastered when that sense withdrawal begins to happen spontaneously each time we sit to practice pranayama or meditation. In fact, most of the meditation exercises you learn in a class or from a book are really just practicing turning inward so that eventually meditation will happen. We can't make ourselves meditate, we can only encourage the process by withdrawing our senses.
Again, why would we even want to do this? Studying the mind is a good way to learn what we actually give our attention to all day. It is a more advance practice of Yama and Niyama, in that we are taking ourselves further into the realm of the endless chatter of the mind to see what this is really all about and whether or not half of what distracts us is even necessary. We are attempting to become more efficient, to waste less fuel, so to speak. Distraction wastes energy. We want to be in control of what distracts us. Some distractions are necessary and even pleasant. Most are not. Who is in control? The practice of sense withdrawal puts us firmly in control. The spontaneous withdrawal of the senses suggests mastery of our senses while also taking us on a fascinating journey to the inner workings of our mind.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Food

Because Yoga is practiced mostly as a form of fitness in this country, it is inevitable that the subject of food will arise. Fitness and Food always go together. On the other hand, when approaching yoga from a more spiritual perspective, the subject of food will also come up. How to nourish ourselves is deeply related to spirituality, especially when one considers the human body a vessel for the spiritual journey.
I've been thinking about food a lot this month since I began working with a personal trainer who has asked me to track everything I consume on a daily basis for a few weeks to see how my diet affects my energy levels. This has been an interesting experiment in Satya and Bramacharya, Truth and Moderation.
Picking up this month's issue of Yoga Journal, lo and behold, there is an article about this very topic! Funny how things work out that way. The author is writing from the perspective of having been an over-weight child and teen and learning to come to terms with food as nourishment for the body rather than medication for the mind. She talks about Satya and Bramacharya and how they play an enormous role in this transition.
Food is a hot topic and one that people are very passionate about, especially those (like myself) who are inclined toward health and fitness. So it is not uncommon for people to really duke it out, in a philosophical "food fight" of sorts, over the topic of what to eat, or what not to eat. This really gets dicey.
Full disclosure: I am a carnivore. This comes as a shock to some in the yoga world. A lot of yogis fervently believe you must be a vegetarian to really practice yoga. I was a vegetarian once. It made me fat and depressed. It has taken more than a decade for me to find a diet that truly suits my physiology. You may have noticed from my little "bio" above that I refer to myself as a "Food Fundamentalist". This is a term I lifted from somewhere off the internet, I don't remember where, from a raving individual who had had it up to here with "Liberal, Yuppie, Subaru-driving food fundamentalists from Vermont". I laughed so hard, recognizing myself immediately, that I have since come to describe myself that way every time I get the chance. A food fundamentalist is someone who only wants the highest quality of food available and has the income to purchase it. Think organic, farmer's markets, raw milk, and you get the picture. Well, that is me. I raise my own chicken for eggs, travel 40 minutes out of my way once a week for raw milk from traditional dairy cows (i.e. not Holsteins), and buy most of my meat, fruit and vegetables from local farmers. I spend a great deal of money on food. But I digress.
The point I am trying to make here is that the one truly yogic approach to food and nutrition is, you guessed it, paying attention. It is not up to others to tell you what you should or should not ingest. It is entirely up to you. It is, in fact, one of the greatest responsibilities you have to yourself. Your physiology is unique to you, and what I eat may not necessarily be good for you. What works wonders for you may be poison for me. Read, learn and experiment with your diet. How does it make you feel? Does your energy crash at some point? Are you holding on to too much body fat? These are issues we all must eventually confront if we want to nourish ourselves optimally. However, if we require a change, the prescription will most likely be different for each one of us.
My personal trainer asked me to limit my daily caloric intake to 1600 for a few weeks. She kept asking me, "how do you feel?" I kept thinking that she meant, "are you getting enough to eat at that level". Eventually I figured out that what she really was talking about was my day-long energy level. When I eliminated sugar and grain from my diet and kept as close to the 1600 calorie limit as possible, I started bouncing off the walls with energy. I finally got it. What my trainer was teaching me is that moderation done properly will give me sustained energy levels. She asked me just yesterday if I wanted to go another week counting calories and I said Yes. Not because I truly want to keep counting calories, which I think is a pain in the butt, but because it is an exercise in Satya and Bramacharya. It is a form of Tapas, or self-discipline which I feel I am greatly benefiting from at this point in my life.
Choosing the diet that is correct for your unique physiology can at times conflict with your practice of Yama and Niyama. As a carnivore, I have to reckon with ahimsa: non-violence. Yogis often choose vegetarianism for this very reason. On the other hand, a high-carbohydrate vegetarian diet is a form of violence to my own body, trapping me in a vicious cycle of blood-sugar swings and robbing me of vital energy. How then do I practice ahimsa with regard to other animals? First and foremost I travel and spend money looking for farmers who raise their animals on a proper diet (e.g. grass) and take great care of them, which in fact extends to the way they even choose to slaughter. When we choose to raise animals, for whatever reason, we bear the responsibility for their proper care. For that reason, where I purchase animal products becomes a very important decision that takes into consideration my values regarding not only my own health, but the health and welfare of the animals involved. That may not seem like an adequate "excuse" for meat-eating to some vegetarians, and that is okay. It is simply the way I reconcile caring for myself as well as for others according to my yogic value system. Caring for the vessel that carries us through our spiritual journey requires a form of Satya that we may not always be comfortable with. But then again, Ashtanga Yoga never promised the path would be easy.

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Using Breath in Every-Day Situations

Here is a good story. Years ago when my son was in pre-school, he had a little run-in with another kid on the playground that I believe involved a sandbox shovel. The mother of this other child, in all fairness, was chronically stressed out by the fact that her son did not handle everyday finagles very well. In retrospect, I believe she wanted her son's social issues to have a simple solution and therefore sought one at every opportunity. On this particular day, she accosted me in the middle of the playground, accusing my son of being some sort of tyrant who was bullying her son by stealing his shovel. She was very angry. Now, this sounds almost comical, and in hindsight it really was. But at the time, I perceived her as a threat. I am not a confrontational person by nature and I could feel my heart starting to race. Had I been confronted with this level of hostility just a few years earlier, before children, this could have developed into a fist-fight. But this was a children's playground! I was a mother, an adult. What to do?? As I stood there with my heart racing, my inner voice said, "just breathe". I consciously slowed and deepened my breath while hearing this woman out. I never took my eyes off of her face. I just stood there, breathing and listening to what she was saying. My heart slowed down, I felt a bit calmer. And then this is what happened: she lowered her voice a bit. Then she removed the hostile tone from it. Then she began to think out loud about what actually happened. She ended up talking herself into a full circle from hostile and accusative to gentle and compassionate, even concluding that her son was most likely to blame for the altercation! How did that happen?? It turned out that remaining calm, quiet and focused allowed this other woman to really hear her tone and her words. She realized she needed to tone it down a bit. The more I listened to her the more she gave up the fight. After all, what she was really looking for was empathy, not a fight. By my withholding a defensive stance, she was able to let go of the hostility and return to a rational state. And it all started with a focus on the breath!
This was a tremendous learning experience for me and I have used it since in other situations with hostile individuals. While it may seem "passive" to allow someone to finish their tirade as you just stand there and breathe, it is actually a very powerful stance in that you are able to remain in a rational state of mind. Anger is irrational - we lose sense of the bigger picture when we become angry. It is also contagious, in that when confronted by an angry individual we ourselves can become angry and defensive. This is how fights break out and usually need to be settled by other people who can distance themselves from the emotional material. To remain calm and rational is infinitely more powerful than even the most violent rage. It is also rather shocking to the enraged one, who is expecting a good fight. It forces your "opponent" to tone it down a notch if he wants to continue the debate. You, as the "breather", have the power to return the dialogue to one of civility, and no matter the outcome, you win because you exercised control over the hostility.

Pranayama 201

This is my favorite pranayama practice. It is nice and easy and can be practiced just about anywhere. Once we've learned to relax the belly, we move on to bring the focus, finally, to the breath. Tune in to your breath. Notice how it feels: slow, fast, smooth, ragged, even, uneven? Just notice its quality for a few minutes without trying to change it. It is important to know that the quality of your breath changes from day to day, hour to hour. There is no one "correct" breath. Don't judge yourself, just notice. When you begin to settle in, feeling relaxed, begin to consciously change your breath. Slow it down a bit, or lengthen it, as I like to tell my students. Draw the breath in a little deeper and exhale a little longer. Try to keep the breath quiet and comfortable, so don't try to fill your lungs to maximum capacity - this will cause anxiety. When all those pesky little thoughts begin to bombard your mind, and they will over and over again, just return to focusing on your breath. Study the quality of this breath you have set for yourself. Is it comfortable enough to continue for several more minutes? If not, change it, soften it or make it a bit shallower. Try to establish a breath you can stick with for a good five minutes. Come back to it again and again each time you are interrupted by thoughts.
If you are able to practice this at least a couple of times per week, you will find that you sink into a nice quiet rhythm pretty quickly and you finish feeling relaxed and refreshed. You may discover that your breath becomes deeper and even develops an aspirant sound to it. That is good. However, I don't recommend that you try to make any sound at the beginning. Trying too hard to make the sound of ujjayi breathing can lead to tension and anxiety and defeat your efforts. Pranayama takes a lot of time and practice, and the best way to be successful is to begin with a focus on relaxation. The breath will unfold from there, becoming deeper and aspirant on its own. Only then are you truly ready to begin the more advanced practices.
Is this meditation? Well, yes, in a way. It is very elementary practice for meditation which comes much later down the road. It is the beginning of pratyahara, or turning inward, as well as gentle conditioning for more advanced pranayama practices.
I use this practice frequently to turn inward and settle my mind. I also use it while lying in bed if I'm having trouble falling asleep. It quiets my mind and allows me to relax enough to let sleep unfold. Most of all, it puts you in touch with your breath, developing an the intuitive sense of when you are anxious or tense, or relaxed and peaceful. This becomes a very useful skill to have throughout life!

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Pranayama 101

Very simple, straight-forward pranayama exercise that can be done just about anywhere: Sit with your back straight and make sure you are comfortable. If you are a practicing yogi and can sit cross-legged on the floor without support, this is the sitting position you should begin with. If you cannot sit upright without support, find a comfortable chair for this exercise. You should be upright in pranayama practices for two reasons: you are moving subtle energy through the chakra system which corresponds to your spinal column, and you don't want to fall asleep! Spend the first few minutes making sure you are comfortable - I mean really comfortable, because if you are not you will be defeated! Make sure your hips are relaxed. If you are cross-legged on the floor you may need a cushion or rolled blanket under your sit-bones. This will aid the pelvis in tilting forward and take the tension out of the hip-flexors. If you are seated in a chair, you may need a cushion, low stool or big book under your feet if you have short legs! Take the time to get your sitting position correct from the get-go.
Once you feel you are upright but relaxed, close your eyes and let your chin drop slightly toward your chest. Bring your focus to your belly. Consciously relax your belly - just let it go. We all tend to suck our bellies in most of the day, so now we are practicing letting them go. It's harder than you think! I don't recommend tight t-shirts for this exercise - big and baggy is better! Let your breath guide you in relaxing the belly. With each inhalation let the belly rise - not the chest, but the belly. With each exhalation, let the belly collapse. The breath is soft and quiet, not at all forced. You may notice that you are beginning to elongate the breath a little and that is okay, but keep your focus on the belly. If you are brand-new to pranayama, this will be your practice: learning to sit upright but relaxed and focusing on letting go of all that tension in the belly. Practice it for 5 minutes each day until you get really good at it. You will notice at first that you keep sucking in the belly and have to remind yourself to let it go. That is okay- that is the practice. You will know you are ready to move on when you realize you no longer need to remind yourself to relax the belly. It may be two days or two months. It doesn't matter. What you are doing is tuning in to your body and using your breath to to release tension and truly relax. This is Pranayama 101.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Pranayama

Prana means life force or vital energy. Ayama is the opposite of yama. Ayama is extention or lengthening, as Yama means restraint or restriction. Pranayama is often translated as breathing exercises while what it really refers to is both the expansion and control of prana. Initially one is introduced to pranayama through "breathing practices" in yoga class which we discover have a remarkable calming effect on the mind. Why is this? We are concentrating our minds, and therefore our energy, on the breath. Slowing down our busy minds relaxes us and allows us to focus our energy better without getting scattered. My teacher has a habit of repeating, "where the breath goes, prana follows". In other words, bring your attention to your breath and get your energy under control!
There are a great many pranayama practices, each one more sophisticated than the previous, designed to take our minds and our energy to an ever increasing state of refinement. "What we want to do is to feel the finer motions that are going on in the body. Our minds have become externalized and have lost sight of the fine motions inside. If we can begin to feel them we can also begin to control them". That is how Swami Vivekananda exlains what we are trying to do with pranayama in Raja Yoga. It is how he summarized the more complex explanation he gives on psychic prana, explaining the ida and pingala currents which carry prana from the base of our spines up to the brain. "according to the Yogis, there are two nerve currents in the spinal column called the Pingala and the Ida, and a hollow canal called the Sushumna, running through the spinal cord. At the lower end of the spinal cord is what the Yogis called the lotus of the Kudalini. When the Kundalini awakes, it tries to force a passage through this hollow canal;and as it tries step by step, layer after layer of the mind opens up and many different visions and wonderful powers come to the Yogi." (Vivekananda, p.50).
This gets to be exciting stuff. What does Feuerstein, the great scholar of yoga, have to say? "In Yoga practice, breath control equals mental control. This formula is as fundamental as Einstein's E=mc² and as far reaching in its practical implications. It is through the proper regulation of the life force that the yogin can not only influence the nervous system and bodily functioning in general but also gain access to the subtle dimensions of existence by transcending the brain-dependent activities of the mind" (Georg Feuerstein, Shambhala Guide to Yoga, pp. 69-71).
Now, I don't know about you, but this just makes me want to sit right down and breathe! Don't worry about reaching enlightenment, just focus on your breath. Lengthen it. Deepen it. Listen to the sound it makes. Try to make your inhalations and your exhalation equal in length. That's all. Try that for five minutes a day and you will be off to a great start. Your chattery mind will settle right down. Any anxiety will be eased. Your blood pressure may drop. You will be experiencing the subtle control over your body's life force that you are capable of when you stop letting your mind be scattered by all the outside influences.